On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
