Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
not ubering you a puppy
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
