There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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