I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
