Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
