were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
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