Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
