TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
