D3 body, D1 cock
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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