no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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