Plan B is the new Plan A
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
