just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
