THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
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