i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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