Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Randomize
