who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
dude i'm inner monologue high
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
