make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
