I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
