once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize