What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
