Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
