i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize