i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
