his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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