Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
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