She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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