Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
