Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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