At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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