so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
