you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
