Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
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