Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
grandma shit on top of the toilet
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
