Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
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