me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I love how my cats smell like pot.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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