she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
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