Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
