I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
