Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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