Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
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