Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
i need some magic done to my vagina
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize
