gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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