he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I love having hate sex.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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