Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
