Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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