if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
