Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I think I am morally bankrupt
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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