For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
