Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
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