so explain again why im purple
no
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
my liver is dry heaving
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
