omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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