There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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